Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Fake people...I can see through you eventually...

There is so much bullshit in the world today, so many people trying to fake us out, trying to pull the wool over our eyes, trying to make us feel special when we're not. This is all fine and dandy if the lies do the trick and we feel better about ourselves and pay it forward, but most of the time you are not smooth and people can see through you. You become, essentially, invisible.

I am reminded of my first venture through the main tourist market in Ho Chi Minh City. You walk in, wandering through all the various clothing stalls. A beckoning voice calls, Hello handsome. Handsome man!  Your ego swells for a minute and think who me? Then you engage the girls in a little idle chit chat until you hear Hello handsome. Handsome man! You watch as an ugly troll passes by and then you get it. Yo comprendo. But some people don't and remain in that distorted world for the rest of their expat lives.

Recently, I've been reminded of this overly fake demeanor and although I was tricked initially, I soon saw through the Louis Vuitton bag and realized the stitching wasn't authentic and the zipper wasn't original. A fake, just like you. If you're prone to fakeness, you need to work on it, to hone those skills so people don't think you're just a fraud. I'll be honest, in each case of recent deception, I was slightly under the influence. I blame myself for being so gullible.

Case #1

I was talking to a friendly female at an expat watering hole. A friend of a friend. She was nice and we got along quite well. I wasn't interested sexually, but conversationally it was good. We are going to be good friends. Ok, whatever. More was said, such as I can feel it or other similar nonsense. We exchanged numbers. Later at another bar, I overheard her speaking to a guy I had recently met and she said the exact same thing. I laughed a little and gave her a stare as if to say did you really just say that?

Case #2

I was at a bar, again. And this time it involves a girl, again. This time, she was working and not a patron of the bar, which makes her actions more understandable. She was selling the bar and I was buying it, so to speak. She came jogging over to say hi with a bright smile on her face, which I was lapping up along with my 60 cent beer. She touched my arm and I sprang to attention. I'm joking, but in that moment, I won't lie, I felt she was truly happy to see me. What did we used to say in fourth grade? Psych!

As we chatted and the vibes went from friendly to flirtatious, she recognized another familiar customer and was off to the races. Hey handsome! Hey, what the fuck. She ran around the other side of the bar to talk to some mediocre looking chap who was also nursing his 60 cent beverage. If I hadn't been so aware of the situation, I would have thought they were a couple. Reminded me of the time my brother's ex-girlfriend said Hey Tyler, how are you? and before I could answer the door to his room was closed.

Case #3

Ok, this example is a bit more obvious. Allow me to elaborate. I was sitting outside a club with my friend imbibing a 32 cent draft beer with accompanying free bowl of peanuts. It was our final drink of the evening before getting some needed slumber. A girl wearing a skirt barely longer than her underwear, fuck me heels and a stare that said I want you for breakfast walked by. It seemed she was definitely working, but I didn't care as long as she was off-duty. I motioned for her to sit down and she did. At this point, my friend laughed and went home to sleep.

She was actually a nice girl, or so I thought initially. Her English was limited, but still conversable. I spoke some Khmer and some English. I offered to buy her a beer. I could handle 32 cents. She wanted a coke. Ok, ok, I relented. A dollar, fuck. Eventually she said something about going inside to get her friend. I could wait and so I did and figured that'd be another coke. No problem.

I was sort of facing the entrance to the club already and started to anticipate her return. I then noticed someone bearing her resemblance sitting with another guy just a stone's throw away. I wish I had a stone. I squinted my eyes to get a clearer picture because to be honest, I wasn't really looking at her face before. It was her! I got up, having momentarily lost my pride, to deliver her coke and have a few words with the fat fucker who was now by her side. Jealous I was. I threw out some angry words in his direction and retreated to my seat, defeated. My blood was boiling and my ego was humiliated.

I guess I just wish people were more up front, that's all, but that's asking too much and in reality, quite difficult for most people. No need to call me handsome if I'm not. No need to falsely compliment if nothing is naturally forthcoming. I don't want to be deceived. If it's the truth, then by all means, speak the truth. Don't fan the flames of my ego because it burns when it gets out of control. When the truth is revealed. That being said, we should all be a little more aware when being fed bullshit. Too much and I've got shit on my face and I don't like that. But live and learn, wash it off and move on.

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