Vietnam, it's good to be back. I haven't smiled this much since the last time I had sex. It's been a while. And before that, when I was in Nepal climbing to Annapurna Base Camp. Nearly a year ago! Not that I haven't had my share of joyous moments lately, but there is something about Vietnam and that is the hidden charm. I soon found myself back on a motorbike bobbing & weaving, zigging & zagging and accelerating & braking through the streets of Saigon. After some initial hesitation, it was like I'd never left. And even though I was stuck in traffic or inhaling some toxic fumes, it was all good and nobody could wipe that smile off my face.
And then there is the food. Holy shit. I haven't had so many orgasms in my mouth in recent months. The food in Cambodia is alright, I really can't complain, but it appears that Vietnamese food hits the G-spot in my mouth with greater accuracy. Saigon is abundant with cơm chay restaurants serving up cheap, delicious vegetarian meals probably also abundant in salt, sugar, MSG and other fun stuff that I don't want to know about. Please, don't ask, don't tell! The fresh fruit, namely the jackfruit this time around and the juices, genetically modified carrot juice in particular...wow!
Starbucks has recently opened in Vietnam and the grand opening was a BIG DEAL, but I refuse to go there. Not that I really care, I just prefer a cheaper cup of joe when I'm in the mood for some head fuzz. Besides, it also means I'd have to get on the motorbike and I've already obtained today's dose of soot up the nose and in the eyes. So, I just walked around the corner, down the alley from my hotel to Highlands, the local chain coffee shop, serving up overpriced cà phê sữa đá since 2002. But, they have air-conditioning! And the carrot cake ain't bad either. Man, I forgot how hot it is in Vietnam. Maybe it's the abundance of asphalt that makes me long for any place with a máy lạnh. It's easy to think the air conditioner is one of the best inventions ever, when you reside in a tropical environment.
Cà phê sữa đá, also known as crack cocaine, tastes like melted coffee ice cream. It's a treat for sure, but now with the ice sufficiently melted, it has a taste that more closely resembles a fresh dog turd on a grassy knoll with an abundance of other dried up crusty turds in the near vicinity. Oh well, I only needed a few sips of the brown stuff anyway otherwise I'd probably need more Tigers this evening to bring me back down. And besides, the carrot cake is actually better. My stomach has been on the receiving end of too much nutrition lately, I didn't want to overwhelm it.
I decided to come back to Vietnam for one primary reason. To pick up my crap that a friend had been so graciously storing for nearly 16 months. I planned to rummage through it and see what I hadn't been missing and therefore, consolidate even further. I got rid of a lot of paperwork, books, pens, old sunglasses, a wig - things that were definitely not worth lugging over the border to my new home in Cambodia in a few day's time. When it came to tossing out clothes, I found myself hesitating to throw anything away. I started seeing dollar signs. I can't throw away that ten dollar bill! That'll cost me $20 to buy in Cambodia. I need those. And on and on. I guess I can deal with a few heavy bags.
Yesterday, I played softball for the first time in a long while. I was ok. But after a couple games, which was followed up with some disc golf, I can honestly say I feel ruined. My legs are sore in places that haven't been sore in a long time and my neck, arms and legs are significantly sunburnt where I can actually feel the heat emanating from my body. I feel that if I were to be attacked by a gang of children tonight, that there would be no fight in this dog. Take my money! Curled up in the fetal position, trying to protect my teeth and my jewels.
So, why don't I just stay in Vietnam? Good one. It's not easy for me to stay in one place. I have issues. I am certainly comfortable in Vietnam, but I know the smile won't last forever. Some of the old annoyances have come back as I knew they would, but I realize now there is little I can do about them. Just have to shrug them off and learn to breathe, which is so often difficult to do. Anyway, I'm not done with Cambodia. I look forward to giving it six months and seeing what happens. A new city with fewer people, perhaps more garbage, but less pollution. A new language that is more intriguing or maybe just easier to pronounce and perhaps fewer, but different opportunities that may present themselves. We shall see. Finding the place for me....
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