Man in the kitchen

It's not too often I've been in the kitchen in recent years other than to wash dishes or mindlessly consume from the fridge. This afternoon, with a little time on my hands and some pre-purchased goods from Trader Joe's, I decided to make an old favorite. Chocolate-covered peanuts. Essentially the same as taking a handful of peanuts and chocolate chips and throwing them into your mouth, but not really. They're a bit more fancy in the form of chocolate peanut clusters. Simple dessert to bring to a potluck or a yummy snack to keep in the fridge and pretend that the goodness in the peanuts is offsetting the empty calories in the chocolate.

First, go to Trader Joe's or your local grocery store. Buy a 16 oz package of roasted and salted peanuts and a 12 oz package of semi-sweet chocolate chips. This is what you'll be mixing and later consuming. I've tasted other chocolate chips and I've yet to find a comparable brand. Buy at your own risk. Don't buy peanuts in the shell unless you really like shelling peanuts and you like the peanut skin as additional roughage.

All the goods you need. 

Set up a double broiler or make your own. I don't even know what a double boiler is. Put a bit of water in a pot, perhaps an inch or two and turn on the heat. Boil that shit. Put a frying pan on top of the pot and make sure the pan is bigger than the pot. If you just asked yourself Why? you probably shouldn't be in the kitchen. You're essentially heating up the pan to melt the chocolate chips without burning them. Throw in the bag of chips and mix 'em up with a metal or wooden spoon. Don't melt plastic shit with your chocolate! You might want to reduce the heat and release some steam from time to time.

The make-shift double boiler.

Chips beginning to lose form.

Almost one.

Once melted, it's time to add the peanuts. Add the peanuts bit by bit. Not peanut by peanut. Unless you really enjoy the process. Try half the bag, mix it up, add the next 1/4, mix and then the remainder. Mix it all up til all the peanuts are covered in chocolate, the scent wafting up into your nostrils without sampling the goods  before you're finished - you'll burn your mouth!

All melted and waiting for peanuts.

All mixed up!

Meanwhile, take out some trays and line them with wax or parchment paper. Actually, set this up beforehand. At this point, the heat should be set to low just to keep the chocolate from setting prematurely. Take a small metal spoon and drop/drizzle spoonfuls of the mix onto the wax paper. It's up to you how big you want your clusters. Once you've finished drizzling the deliciousness onto the trays, find a space in the fridge and give them an hour or three to set. I prefer my chocolate to melt in my mouth, not on my hands.

Lined tray waiting for its purpose in life.

Make as big as you like.

Put in the fridge and give time to set.

Now you get to clean up. Spoon the remaining melted chocolate from the pan and insert into your mouth. Don't count calories, it's definitely not worth it. If you've spilled a little chocolate whilst transferring from the pan to the tray, don't worry, it's still edible. Eat and enjoy, wash those fucking dishes as soon as possible and do something to take your mind off the fridge. Eat whatever meal comes next to get some quality calories down your throat and fill your belly and then open the fridge and indulge. You're welcome.

These won't last long.

Zoom in to drool.