Vietnam. What is the hidden charm?

The tourism slogan of Vietnam, at least when I was there, was Vietnam, The Hidden Charm. It seemed accurate because the place is charming, but it's hard to pinpoint exactly what or where the charm is. We used to make fun of the slogan saying something to the effect of yeah, but nobody knows what it is!

Apparently the slogan has changed. Who knew? Now it is Vietnam, Timeless Charm. They seemed to have made the switch in early 2012. It's a bit vague to me and looks even more dated than its predecessor. There was even another slogan in the mix further adding to the confusion. That was Vietnam, A Different Orient, which was the winning entry in a nationwide contest, but was rejected by the Ministry of Culture, Sports and Tourism. You can read about that debacle here. If I was the winning designer, I'd be annoyed to say the least. Hopefully they got to keep the cash, if there was any.

I like the star, which kind of reminds me of a starfish, but I don't know why they chose so many colors. And the word orient, I didn't know anyone used that word anymore. I like the choice in font for A Different Orient, but again, this logo seems dated. 

My opinion does not matter. I'm just stating it anyway. Truth be told, I like The Hidden Charm better than the more recent variations. The original logo was nothing special, but the slogan made sense. I'm no designer, but I think my design, a fifteen minute Photoshop special and therefore a little rough around the edges, looks better than the original, but then again, I am just a little biased.

Back to the slogan, the old slogan. I think basically the charm was all the little things you saw on a daily basis that makes Vietnam what it is. Things that you just don't see elsewhere. All of those little things are charming in and of themselves, but wouldn't be enough on its own to drive tourism. You need all the pieces of the puzzle. Everything working together. So, you throw all the little charming bits together, mix 'em up and you find them incomparably charming. Collectively we'll call them the charm. And since you can never see all these charming moments at the same time, it is thus hidden. That's my theory anyway.

Five skinny guys riding by on a motorbike. Or a family of seven, some standing, some squatting and some seemingly defying gravity. A group of girls strolling to school wearing white silky ao dais. The traffic is chaotic yet controlled. Motorists running red lights. Evading the police. Riding on sidewalks. A feeling that this is a no rules society. A woman on a motorbike with a dog at her feet and a dog on the seat behind. A guy with a boxed refrigerator on the back of his motorbike that doesn't appear to be tied down. A family of five coming going down a one-way street in the wrong direction in the dark with no headlight in the pouring rain. Mind boggling. But charming all the same.

Women wearing pajamas all day long. Men wearing white ankle socks, pointy black dress shoes drinking cà phê sữa đá all day long. Xe ôm drivers napping on their motorbikes. Hearing You so handsome as you walk through the market. Am I? Sitting on tiny cracked plastic stools in the evening, drinking cheap beer and eating delicious food on the sidewalk watching the world go by. Being a part of the insanity. Living in a place that feels like an ant hill that has just been stepped on. The hustle and bustle is occasionally too intense. Feeling totally enlivened one moment and completely exhausted the next. How do people live like this?

I won't get into it all. That's just what immediately comes to mind. There is the magic in the mountains in the north where a number of ethnic minorities live. Sapa! The terraced rice paddies, women with long hair down to their mông, the limestone outcroppings in Halong Bay and in Ninh Bình. The ladies carrying bamboo poles over their shoulders. Verdant green rice paddies, the incredible downpours during the rainy season, people who won't take no for an answer. Shoe shine? No. Shoe shine? No, thanks. Shoe shine? No!

It's even the habits that we loathe. Public nose picking is omnipresent. People getting on an elevator before anyone has gotten off. Line cutting. Cupping your mouth while using a toothpick to avoid offending anyone. Never mind digging for gold without a care in the world. Or talking on your mobile phone so that everyone can hear you. Turning right from where you'd normally turn left. Cutting people off. It's all part of the charm. I'm not sure if I've really convinced myself. It may not seem like it at the time, but as a whole, it's all what sets Vietnam apart. How it differs from our own norms.

In any case, I'm sure there are a number of men who might beg to differ. Myself being one of them. Sure, maybe all of what I've mentioned so far is what makes Vietnam charming not to mention incredibly frustrating at the same time. Well, if that's not it, what else could it be? What is the real charm? I'll tell you. Maybe it's legs. Well, not just any old legs. Sexy, feminine legs. You've got to be kidding me. You heard me. It makes total sense. Covered during the day they are hidden. Nobody wants dark skin so they wear their áo dài, pajamas, tight jeans or stay at home. And then bam! The evening rolls around and they are exposed. The cat's out of the bag. You were just on your way home after work and you saw some legs. Some long legs straddling the back of a motorbike. And then some more. They're everywhere! All of a sudden you find yourself driving to the bar for "just one." Incredibly charming, distracting and enchanting. That's what is, folks. Legs, the hidden charm. It's about time we knew.